Midweek Meditation: Desiring God Above All

This is a beautiful prayer by the mother of the famous John Wesley.

conrade

BookPastor >> "The Good Fight"

What makes a good marriage? Is it avoiding all kinds of conflicts or fights? Is it a happily-ever-after, and never-ever-fight scenarios? Obviously not. All marriages have their problems. The thing is to learn not to avoid but to engage, not to flee but to fight fair and well. The main purpose for married couples: We are in it together.  This book is a good read. The review was first published at "Panorama of a Book Saint" on April 24th, 2013.


conrade

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TITLE: The Good Fight: How Conflict Can Bring You Closer
AUTHOR: Drs Les and Leslie Parrot
PUBLISHER:  Brentwood, TN: Worthy Publishing, 2013, (210 pages).

Is all conflict bad? Is there any benefit at all in fighting? When married couples quarrel, is it a sign of a crumbling marriage? In this book, two established marriage counselors give their take about the difference between conflict and resolution. In other words, "It's how you fight, not whether you fight" that is the key point. Dispelling the myth of good married couples as those who live happily ever after, psychologist Les, and family therapist Leslie, come together to help readers distinguish bad fights from good fights, enable couples to grow in authenticity with each other, and to cultivate resilience of the relationship amid adversity. Putting proper perspective in every kind of conflict, we learn how to measure our "conflict quotient" like distinguishing the trivial from the important, learning the rules of engagement, keeping the fight fair and honest, and even uncovering our own "fight" styles. Just like there are rules to any sports or games, the Parrotts put forth three rules for cooperation; two rules of ownership; two rules of respect; and two rules of empathy; as a way to help couples fight well. That is not all. Fighting well also produces another benefit: Learning more about our own selves. For instance:

• Competitive Fighter: One who is high in expressiveness, and low in flexibility
• Collaborative Fighter: One who is high in expressiveness, and high in flexibility
• Conciliatory Fighter: One who is low in expressiveness, and high in flexibility
• Cautious Fighter: One who is low in expressiveness, and low in flexibility.

In fact, knowing what kind of fighter we are is a tremendous asset in learning how to fight well. Using their knowledge and experience, the authors then teach readers on the various combinations of the fight styles, and subsequently apply them through five big applications: Money, Sex, Work, Parenting, and Housework.

On and on, the consistent message in the book is that fighting is not necessarily a bad thing. It can even save one's marriage like releasing steam to prevent the marriage kettle from blowing up. It creates a deeper intimacy between couples. Ultimately, it brings about greater peace, as couples learn more about each other, about themselves, and more importantly, about the simple things that matter more to any marriage. There is a whole chapter on dealing with anger, a critical aspect of any conflict resolution.

My Thoughts

Drs Les and Leslie Parrott have done it again. Not only have they brought together their own expertise and fighting experiences, they have structured a powerful resource to help all couples deal with their differences, their disagreements, and their disappointments, whenever married couples feel less than "happily ever after." Just because a marriage is not happy or funny, does not mean that it is not a good marriage. In fact, a good marriage is one that is filled with both laughter and tears, joys and sorrows, hugs and fights. It is a myth to think that good marriages are those that are without fights or conflicts. All marriages will have fights from time to time. It is how we deal with each fight as they come along. Avoidance can only make it worse. Untimely engagement will be unhelpful too. What is important is to recognize that when the fight comes, both couples are ready to deal with it fairly, promptly, appropriately, and most of all, lovingly. In keeping up with the times, the authors have also included a free app that can be downloaded and installed in the increasingly common smartphones we have.

This book does not make readers look forward to fights. It gives couples the freedom and the courage to tough it out together, knowing that behind every fight, is an opportunity to learn, to listen, to heal, to relate, to reconcile, and to understand each other better. After reading this book, readers will be reminded again the traditional marriage vow:

"I _____ take thee _____, to be my husband/wife, to have and to hold, for better or for worse; for richer, for poorer; in sickness and in health; .... till death do us part."

Fighting well, is actually within this vow. Remember that in each fight, if we hurt our spouses, we are also hurting ourselves, for couples are in it together. Thanks to Les and Leslie Parrott, we have a great resource to help us maintain a fuller view of what we have first promised our mates.

Rating: 4.5 stars of 5.

conrade

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This book is provided to me free by Worthy Publishing without any obligation for a positive review. All opinions offered above are mine unless otherwise stated or implied.

Midweek Meditation: "Be Still"

This video clip is awe-inspiring as it demonstrates the power of concentration and focus. It is one thing to be able to sense weight. It is another to be able to sense something quite weightless, like a feather. As I watch this, I am reminded of the power of concentration on God. It gives us a fresh look at the words of the Psalmist who says: "Be still and know that I am God." (Ps 46:10a)



conrade

BookPastor >> "NIV Quickview Bible"

Do you learn better visually? Will it be great if you can get a good overview of a particular Bible book or period with tables, charts, and colourful diagrams? What about illustrations that make you want to dig into the Bible for yourselves more? If the answers are yes, this Bible may be for you.

This review was first published at "Panorama of a Book Saint." 

conrade

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TITLE: NIV QuickView Bible
AUTHOR: The Zondervan Quickview Bible Team
PUBLISHER: Grand Rapids, MI: Zondervan, 2012, (1110 pages).


This is one of those love-at-first-sight Bible resources to have. Included with the entire New International Version English Bible translation (latest 2011 version), the Bible is filled with vivid colours that are refreshing, and illustrations that bring out the Bible's truth with clarity and insights. Using more than 360 intelligent visual infographics, it makes navigating the Bible a richer and more exciting adventure. The Bible team recognizes that 83% of all human learning occurs visually. At the same time, the QuickView Bible brings a refreshing new perspective on the stories, the messages, the histories, and the ancient texts, making readers more excited to get into the text for themselves.  There are many visual eye-candies like:

• Colour coding the ten different divisions of the whole Bible;
• Simple explanation of how we get our Bibles;
• Breakdown of Noah's 375 days in the Ark;
• Life story of Jacob, Moses, and others clearly diagrammed;
• Jewish Calendar and our modern equivalents;
• Table of all the kings of Israel and Judah;
• Contrast of Jesus' teachings about light and darkness
• Paul's Teachings;
• Spiritual Gifts;
• Maps of Canaan, the Divided Kingdom, Palestine, Israel, and many more;

It is hard not to like this book. Old Testament laws are clearly laid out with the purposes of them weaved with the mercy of God. The gospels are also full of charts and diagrams to give readers a glimpse of the idea flow, which encourages the reader to read the text more carefully to check the biblical texts for themselves. There are three things which I really appreciate about this Quickview Bible. Firstly, it enhances the reading of the Bible with some brilliant bird's eye view of the Bible story. For instance, in the book of First Samuel, we read how the biblical author narrates the different characters who change their allegiances. There is also a highs and lows chart to show the erratic life of Saul, how he rises valiantly at the beginning, fumbles along in the middle, and ultimately kills himself at the end. Secondly, the maps are incorporated appropriately in the texts that help readers appreciate the geographical aspects of the texts being read. Normally, we will need a Bible atlas to accompany the study of the Bible. This Quickview Bible incorporates some of the most important maps within the Bible itself, enabling the reader to remain on the page without having to flip open another book to refer to the same thing. Thirdly, from a preaching and teaching perspective, the infographics are powerful ways to communicate the big ideas of the Bible. The colours are well used. The adjectives are carefully chosen. The placement of the infographics are sensitively placed to enable readers to read the texts with the big ideas in mind.

Having said that, there are some drawbacks with regards to using such a Bible. First, readers may unwittingly pay more attention to the infographics rather than the Bible itself. After all, if 83% of people learn better with visual material, will that also mean about 83% of the attention will be biased toward the infographics rather than the text? Second, the infographics are by themselves an interpretation. There is little explanation of why, how, and what are the facts leading up to the way the charts and illustrations are done. From a scholarship perspective, there is no way to cite any individual or individuals for each graphic. For example, what are the factors leading up to the declaration of the "Top 5 Reasons to Praise God in Psalms" on page 524? Where are the proof texts pertaining to the big ideas in the "Song of Songs" or Jeremiah? Third, the very idea of a "Quick view" can pose a problem for cultivating the spirituality of waiting and contemplation.  Some of the best spiritual exercises are only cultivated through patience. While it is quick as far as mental grasps of the facts are concerned, reading the Bible is not just about knowledge, but the application of such knowledge in wisdom and in discernment.

That said, I still consider this Quickview Bible a precious resource for learning and teaching. As long as readers understand the pros and cons of using such a resource. I highly recommend this as a learning supplement, not a full replacement of the reading of the Bible. If you like to check out some of the infographics, click here.

Rating: 4.75 stars of 5.

conrade

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This book is provided to me free by Zondervan Bible Marketing Team without any obligation for a positive review. All opinions offered above are mine unless otherwise stated or implied.

Our Bible Be Read (like we use our cell phones)

A dear brother in Christ shared with me this video that reflects our attachment to our cell phones. Many researches and surveys have pointed to the cell-phone as one of the most important possessions people can ever have. Losing one's cellphone can essentially mean losing a lot of personal information like photos, emails, text messages, contact lists, calendar, appointment schedules, and many more. Manufacturers have even made phones so light and fashionable that it can fit into any pocket, any purse, or any bag. With technologies like Bluetooth, there is no need to even pick up the phone to make calls. Some people can even feel lost or anxious when they are separated away from their prized possession.

What the creator of this video is essentially saying is: "What if we do to our Bibles what we do to our cellphones?"

• Do we spend time looking after it and reading it?
• Do we go to it first thing in the event of any emergency?
• Is our relationship with God through the Bible more or less important with our relationship with our cell phones?

It may evoke some guilt feelings among those of us phone addicts, but if it can spur anyone to read more of the Bible, it is worth it. One more thing. I understand some readers will argue that they have downloaded Bibles into their cell phones, and so, when they take care of their cellphones, they are also taking care of the Bible. The cell phone is then a 2-in-1 device. I agree with that to a certain extent, except that, one then needs to ask how frequent they read their digital Bibles in the first place? I for one, have downloaded many versions of the digital Bibles, but compared to my printed copies, I do find myself reading less as the cellphones are so prone to distractions. For example, all it takes is one text message or an incoming phone call, and we can easily take the call, ignoring whatever we are reading.

 

Remember, it is the attitude of the heart that the video is urging us toward. An attitude that cherishes the Word of God, just like we cherish the ubiquitous cellphones we love.

 conrade

Midweek Meditation: "Pass Me Not O Gentle Savior"

This hymn is one of my favourites by Fanny Crosby.

Pass me not, O gentle Savior,
Hear my humble cry;
While on others Thou art calling,
Do not pass me by.

Refrain:
Savior, Savior,
Hear my humble cry,
While on others Thou art calling,
Do not pass me by.

Let me at Thy throne of mercy
Find a sweet relief;
Kneeling there in deep contrition,
Help my unbelief.

Trusting only in Thy merit,
Would I seek Thy face;
Heal my wounded, broken spirit,
Save me by Thy grace.

Thou the spring of all my comfort,
More than life to me,
Whom have I on earth beside Thee,
Whom in Heav’n but Thee.

conrade

BookPastor >> "Insourcing" (Randy Pope)

Is your Church stuck on how to grow? Do you think that a super pastor is the one to help your Church grow? Maybe, programs and attractive offerings will bring people into your Church? How about simply let your Church go all out to help the poor? All of these may have advantages, but their disadvantages are many. Is there a way to do discipleship? According to Randy Pope, the answer lies in life-on-life discipleship. This review was first published at "Panorama of a Book Saint" on April 25th, 2013. 

conrade

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TITLE: Insourcing: Bringing Discipleship Back to the Local Church (Leadership Network Innovation Series)
AUTHOR: Randy Pope
PUBLISHER: Grand Rapids, MI: Zondervan, 2013, (224 pages).

Do we really need another book on discipleship? Is there anything new to learn about making disciples? In our busy world, and the many complex ministry models, can we still have a discipleship model that is simple and clear, without being simplistic and impractical? There is one answer to all of these questions. Yes!

Randy Pope begins the book with a contemplative moment about his own Church ministry, Perimeter Church. With his Church on a growing path, with ministry pretty much cruising along, with general satisfaction that programs and people are already a part of the ministry, something still troubles Pope. What is the target? Yes, it is true that the ultimate target is the worship of God and glorifying the Heavenly Father. It is also true that people can worship God through the programs. The question is, is that enough? Is that what discipleship all about? After some struggle with the question of target, the author lands on two words that provide the thrust of his discipleship model: "mature and equipped." Discipleship is essentially about helping individuals in the community toward maturity and being equipped to worship God in every possible way. Pope starts off with a remarkable summary of three common models of ministry. The first model is the "Pastoral Model," which requires a "multi-talented, maintenance-oriented shepherd." If the Church is small, and the needs are few, this model generally suffices. The trouble is, the existing climate has become much more complex and needs have been more varied than before. The second model is that of an "Attractional Model." Beef up the message, boost up the music, and birth new methods so that more people will be attracted to the church. This model of relevance appeals to a consumeristic culture, and is strong in attracting people in, but weak in sending people out as witnesses. The third model is "Influential Model" which is high in social action and community influence. Unfortunately, it may result in churches and Christian organizations becoming another social help group without much of an identity. For Randy Pope, all of these models do not seem to prepare his Church as far as discipleship is concerned. By weaving together the positive elements of each model, and weeding out the rest, Pope focuses on a life-on-life model that essentially reflects the journey of a growing disciple. This life-on-life model is in turned based on a framework credited to Ken Blanchard. Blanchard's four stage leadership model moves as follows:

1. Stage I - Direct
2. Stage II - Coach
3. Stage III - Support
4. Stage IV - Delegate

An important note is that one cannot jump from stage I to stage IV. Each stage has to be covered. The same goes for the Life-on-Life discipleship model. Pope modifies the above using the acronym TEAMS to describe the five emphases of the model.

1. Stage 1 - Truth
2. Stage 2 - Equipping
3. Stage 3 - Accountability
4. Stage 4 - Mission
5. Stage 5 - Supplication (not exactly a stage, but something that covers every stage)

The rest of the book condenses a three-year discipleship journey into six meetings via a fictional journey to incorporate the whole story. The appendices provide key resources for readers and leaders to jump start their own versions of discipleship based on this life-on-life model.

My Thoughts

The book's key emphasis is that every individual matters. Far too often, we have become distracted over programs, and our infatuation with numbers of people. By doing so, in desiring to be more relevant, churches are constantly inundated with greater and greater demands for more flashy and attractional programs that are not sustainable, they fail to equip and help members mature as a community of believers. At the same time, too much inward ministry toward meeting needs of people through chronic care can cause a ministry to implode into self-centered ministries. We are reminded that Jesus spends more than 90% of his time with his twelve disciples. There are no megachurches then. Jesus is focused on lives, one at a time. So should we. Every life counts. If our target is toward a mature community, we need to start working at helping individuals mature. If our target is to equip, we need to let the mission guide our strategies and resources to be used for the purpose of equipping people FOR the mission. It is not the ministry that determines the mission. It is the mission that determines the ministry, and it is a clear understanding of the target of the mission that determines the ministry models required. 

This is no ordinary book on discipleship. Richly insightful and downright practical, leaders will be pleased to have in their hands a book that is marinated with profound ideas and generous in real-life stories, filled with examples of what it means to journey together one-on-one. I like the way Pope reviews the old paradigms and takes care not to throw them all away. Instead, he learns the best from them, adapts where necessary, and infuses some new insights to make it all fresh and exciting. Note that every Church is unique. Every Church is different in its resources, it contexts, and its strategies. This book will not only help Christian organizations to take a critical look at their existing programs, and start making bold initiatives, to breathe life into the old, and to let God build something new out of it all. Great book on discipleship!

Rating: 4.5 stars of 5.

conrade

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This book is provided to me free by Zondervan Academic and NetGalley without any obligation for a positive review. All opinions offered above are mine unless otherwise stated or implied.